"LLANO GAL"

This is a continuation of the "BIGFOOT SAGA." Her name is Jaime strawberry, and she is "teched" in the head. The folks along the Llano call her "Llano gal." She is the granddaughter of Axel Snodgrass, and the pride of the Snodgrass clan. Her mother, Axel's daughter, is also "teched" in the head; as a matter of fact, all of the Snodgrass's are "teched" in the head. Jaime loves to wander over the hills and dales of the Llano valley, picking wild flowers and arranging them in her hair in a haphazard pattern, so she looks like a walking bush. The people of Llano are accustomed to seeing Jaime looking like something from a fairy tale, so, they pay her no mind. Early one morning, as the fog was lifting from the Llano River, Jaime was seen walking hand in hand with some huge, hairy critter. She was seen by Addy Gumm and Lorenzo Hogbotthem as they were gathering wild gourds along the river bank. At first they didn't think anything about it, but suddenly, Lorenzo turned white as a sheet, and began to dribble tobacco juice from the corners of his mouth, mumbling, "I-I-it-it's-a-a-b-bi-big-f-f-foot!" Addy Gumm, having just acquired a brand spanking new, set of "Roebucks" (one size fits all), whistled and clacked, trying to say something, but the "Roebucks" kept jutting from between her lips, so that in her desperation, she spit them out on the ground and shouted, "Well, I'd a never believed it, if'n I hain't a seed it wit my own eyes!" Lorenzo and Addy hit out lickety-split for town, shouting at the top of their lungs that Jaime "wuz Bigfoot napped!" Everybody from the barber-shop hospital, the butcher shop and the court house, ran, frantically out into the street to see what the commotion was all about. Chestor Nestor, the Constable, and Willy Mortimer, the Mayor, tried to make sense out of what Addy, with her "Roebucks" back in place, and Lorenzo, mumbling and drooling tobacco juice, were trying to say, but nothing intelligible was forthcoming. Finally, Chestor Nestor, squeezing Addy's jaws, forced her "Roebucks" to pop out, and breathlessly, Addy related what she and Lorenzo had seen that morning along the Llano. Eventually, the story was proclaimed to all and sundry, and it was determined that a searching-hunting party be launched forthwith. The denizens of Llano turned out in masse, armed to the teeth with pitchforks, axes, sledghammers, chain saws, a shotgun or two, and even a bow and arrow. The searching-hunting party made its way down to where Addy and Lorenzo had seen the alleged abduction, and after searching for a few moments, they heard a child-like humming coming from the thicket on the opposite side of the river. They waded across, (as the Llano is shallow most of the year, except when it rains, which is hardly ever), and sitting in the bushes was Jaime Strawberry, her hair sticking up all over with weeds and prickly-burrs mixed in with her floral arrangement, and her clothes covered with dirt and brush. She was just sitting there, murmuring to herself, and grinning from ear to ear...