"FROGS"

"ONCE"

Hebriews 9:27

There were two frogs in a pond, croaking away next to each other on twoLilly pads, and one frog croaked to the other, "We must be (croak) careful where we (croak) expose ourselves (croak) at night around this (croak) boghood. The other frog croaked, "Yeah, (croak) there's always danger from those (croak) "evil ones" who love to find us croaking away, (croak) seemingly, without a care in all of vast (croak) pondville." The other frog croaked, "Yeah, (and if a frog can laugh, it did so) I've heard the frog elders say, (croak) that the "evil ones" love to eat us, (croak) which (croak) is frog-boggling!" "Yeah," croaked the other frog, "they say (croak) that after they have stabbed us (croak) with their three pronged (croak) spears, they cut off our legs, (croak) and cook them in a pan, (croak) and they also say that (croak) our legs try to jump our of the pan." (croak)! And the frogs had a croaking good croak a long time over that... The spiritual pond in which we live is a dangerous place. Lurking amongst the Lilly pads and reeds of our pondville are the emissaries of Satan, who love to gig us in all the right places, and if they can catch us unaware, they can cause us great spiritual harm, and possibly kill us. And like the frogs, who laughed at the idea that their legs could escape from the frying pan, we should be laughing at the possibility that we can escape hell's fury, when we are foolish enough to be found croaking away in our spiritual bog, unaware that we are about to be gigged, supposing that because we are professing frogs we can escape the barbed prong of judgment. (croak, croak, croak!) SHALOM :)

:)

Croak, croak, croak, listen to the message of the frog. Croak, croak, croak, listen to the message from the bog. :) Evil is no joke, it haunts the brackish bogs, gigging unsuspecting frogs in the croaking of a croak.

"DONKEY"

:)

"You knucklehead, are you dead? can't you see?

Open your eyes, you might be surprised,

and please stop beating me!"

:)

"You're my donkey.

Am I not free to do with you as I please?

And why do you refuse to do what I choose, and go hence? instead you smash my foot against a fence. Geese!"

:)

"If you're fool enough to go on, it won't be long

before you're dead.

So, if you're determined to die, I won't cry,

'cause you're a dern, dumb knucklehead."

:)

"Well, I be! if you ain't a wacky-smart-alecky donkey

that cain't do what I say.

So, I'll treat you as is meet, and beat

your stubbornness away."

:)

"I'll lay down, and not move, you clown,

'cause you're headed for disaster.

So, go ahead and smack and whack;

'cause if you're determined to go ahead,

be my guest, but not on my back."

:)

"Well, if that don't beat all, my leg crushed by a fall,

and an ass speaking to me!

:)

And if that weren't enough, laying down a bluff,

'cause this insanity just can't be."

:)

"Lord, open his eyes that he might see,

that that angel is not standing there for show,

but to foil a 'kuckle-headed fool

'cause he's chosen the wrong way to go."

:)

"Oops! Now I see an awesome sight,

an Angel with sword in hand right in front of me.

I'll go back, but shamed by the fact,

that a dumb donkey saw

what a jackass couldn't see."

:)

SHALOM :)

LLANO CHRONICLES

I thought I was good,

I did everything right,

at least what I could

with all of my might.

But I lived a lie,

because in my youth

I thought I would never die,

which was far from the truth.

So, now that I'm old,

I've opened my eyes,

and I'm not so bold

to believe my own lies.

REFLECTION

I was a fool once,

my mind was out to lunch,

my heart was out of sync,

I thought, but didn't think.

Then I began to see,

the reality of God in me,

and it was then I knew,

everything about God was true.

FOOLS

A fool asks his friend, who is also a fool,

"Do you believe in God?"

The other fool said, "Nah!

He never did anything for me!"

"Yeah!" said the other fool, "Me neither!"

"But what about all those people who do?"

The second fool said, "Aw! they're all fools!"

BIGFOOT SAGA

"LET EVERYTHING THAT HAS BREATH"

Twas the night before Christmas,

and all through the house,

not a creature was stirring

except one little mouse.

It scampered along the floor

on its cold, little feet,

looking for something,

but not something to eat.

It looked in every room

in the silent, old house,

which was quite a undertaking

for one little mouse.

So, not finding what it

was looking for,

squeezed through

a tiny crack 'neath the door.

It raced through the cold, wet snow

to the stable out back,

and peered cautiously

through a thin, little crack.

It could hear voices

with its pointed, little ears,

and animal sounds so peaceful,

it calmed all of its fears.

Inside the stable,

what did its beady, little eyes behold?

something of wonder

that the prophets foretold;

a child lay in a manger

swaddled in gold.

It did a back-flip,

and ran in circles

for awhile,

its little heart

beat farantically,

and on its little mouth,

a huge mouse smile.

The people were gathered

around the manger

where the little child lay,

the shepherds kneeling in adoration

in the soft, yellow hay.

The little mouse,

filled with joy,

scampered back to its lair,

and told the mousehold

waithing there

about the beautiful baby boy.

So, all the mice marveled

at this wonderful thing,

and the mousehouse vibrated,

as all the mice

did sing...

"LLANO GAL"

This is a continuation of the "BIGFOOT SAGA." Her name is Jaime strawberry, and she is "teched" in the head. The folks along the Llano call her "Llano gal." She is the granddaughter of Axel Snodgrass, and the pride of the Snodgrass clan. Her mother, Axel's daughter, is also "teched" in the head; as a matter of fact, all of the Snodgrass's are "teched" in the head. Jaime loves to wander over the hills and dales of the Llano valley, picking wild flowers and arranging them in her hair in a haphazard pattern, so she looks like a walking bush. The people of Llano are accustomed to seeing Jaime looking like something from a fairy tale, so, they pay her no mind. Early one morning, as the fog was lifting from the Llano River, Jaime was seen walking hand in hand with some huge, hairy critter. She was seen by Addy Gumm and Lorenzo Hogbotthem as they were gathering wild gourds along the river bank. At first they didn't think anything about it, but suddenly, Lorenzo turned white as a sheet, and began to dribble tobacco juice from the corners of his mouth, mumbling, "I-I-it-it's-a-a-b-bi-big-f-f-foot!" Addy Gumm, having just acquired a brand spanking new, set of "Roebucks" (one size fits all), whistled and clacked, trying to say something, but the "Roebucks" kept jutting from between her lips, so that in her desperation, she spit them out on the ground and shouted, "Well, I'd a never believed it, if'n I hain't a seed it wit my own eyes!" Lorenzo and Addy hit out lickety-split for town, shouting at the top of their lungs that Jaime "wuz Bigfoot napped!" Everybody from the barber-shop hospital, the butcher shop and the court house, ran, frantically out into the street to see what the commotion was all about. Chestor Nestor, the Constable, and Willy Mortimer, the Mayor, tried to make sense out of what Addy, with her "Roebucks" back in place, and Lorenzo, mumbling and drooling tobacco juice, were trying to say, but nothing intelligible was forthcoming. Finally, Chestor Nestor, squeezing Addy's jaws, forced her "Roebucks" to pop out, and breathlessly, Addy related what she and Lorenzo had seen that morning along the Llano. Eventually, the story was proclaimed to all and sundry, and it was determined that a searching-hunting party be launched forthwith. The denizens of Llano turned out in masse, armed to the teeth with pitchforks, axes, sledghammers, chain saws, a shotgun or two, and even a bow and arrow. The searching-hunting party made its way down to where Addy and Lorenzo had seen the alleged abduction, and after searching for a few moments, they heard a child-like humming coming from the thicket on the opposite side of the river. They waded across, (as the Llano is shallow most of the year, except when it rains, which is hardly ever), and sitting in the bushes was Jaime Strawberry, her hair sticking up all over with weeds and prickly-burrs mixed in with her floral arrangement, and her clothes covered with dirt and brush. She was just sitting there, murmuring to herself, and grinning from ear to ear...

LAMENTATION

Oh world, world, what are you doing

sowing seeds of hatred and violence

in the name of your gods?

Your soil runs red with blood;

your air is polluted with the stench of death

in the name of your gods!

You kill, torture and terrorize.

Chaos and confusion are your mandates

in the name of your gods!

Your armies are everywhere,

conquering, yet it's never enough

in the name of your gods!

Oh, world, you can't be satisfied

now that you've tasted blood

in the name of your gods!

Your young, your old, lust for glory,

brandishing sword without mercy

in the name of your gods!

You've no enemies left,

you've killed them all

in the name of your gods!

What will you do in the end,

when all is said and done?

Devastated and without a friend

you find that you have no gods, no, not one!

:)